She Grunts of Love and Other Things

It's really quite sad. My daughter cannot communicate.

Well, okay that's not exactly true. She is, after all, only 17 months old. Perhaps it's more accurate to say she cannot speak the words to communicate what she is thinking and feeling. But, she is fully capable of communicating that which NEEDS to be heard.

It's not unusual for her to attempt a few of the standard approximations like:

"Baa-Baa" This phrase, having nothing to do with sheep, of course means, "I want my bottle." There is another variation of "Baa-Baa!" which has the slightest twinge of desperation in it. But that's more like "BAAAaaaa-BAAAaaa!" with an ever so slight whine. Either one of these can only be translated as,

"My baby brother has a bottle and I want my bottle, and I should
like to have one too, NOW!"

This phrase will be repeated relentlessly until it has achieved it's desired result.

Another phrase that can often be heard is "Nigh-Nigh."

"Nigh-Nigh" has two variations. One variation of "Nigh-Nigh" is posed as a question. "Nigh-Nigh?" Which means

"Dad, why are you changing my diaper and putting me into my pajamas?
I'm not sleepy Dad. Dad, here, let me show you how not sleepy I am.
I'm so glad my changing table is right next to this light switch. See how I can
kick the light switch with my foot and flick it off and on. Isn't that funny Dad?
Isn't that neat Dad? Wow, Dad, aren't I great? I can control the light in the room
with my foot! Isn't that amazing Dad? Dad, I'm really not tired."

To which I respond, "Night, Night Meg." Silence and then---Waaghh! Let the cries of desperation begin.

The other variation of this phrase is "Nigh-Nigh-Baa-Baa." When translated this means,

"Mom, Dad, I'm tired and I'm ready for bed. But first, before I go to bed
I need my bottle, and could you warm it in the microwave and while you
are doing that could you please carry me into my room and change my
diaper and put my pajamas on me because if I have to walk in there I'm
quite sure I'll have to throw a fit."

To which I reply with outstreched arms. "Let's get your bottle Meggy. It's night-night time."

Then there is the classic "Ma Ma" and "Da Da" which is, of course, a reference to Mom and Dad. But, "Ma Ma?" in a whining, inquisitive, repititious voice means,

"Mom, Where did you go? I wandered into my room to play with my toys
and you did not follow me. I need you in here to play with me."

Or "Ma Ma!" with excitement and outstreched arms means,

"Pick me up and hold me. I need to be held and I need to hold you.
I love you from the ground all the way up to the sky, Mom. So won't
you hold me, Mom? I really need to be held."

To which Mom replies with outstretched arms, "Come see Momma, Meg."

But there is nothing like that most eloquent of phrases. The multi-meaning "Unghh!"

"Unghh!" Say it. Say it twice. Say it ten times in a row and add the slightest touch of whine to the end of each word. Yes, that's it, you've got it. "Unghh" can mean so many things. Of course taken out of its proper context it means nothing. But "Unghh!" with a twinge of desperation a deliberate fixed stare, and a pointing finger, well now that's a different story altogether. This clearly translates to,

"Dad, I want that chocolate kiss sitting on the counter over there.
You know Dad, it's been sitting there for three days and I really, really
want that shiny wrapped piece of candy. And Dad, before you give it to
me (because you know you are a sucker for your little girl, Dad) could
you take the shiny wrapper off it so I don't swallow the shiny stuff like
I did last time when I took one of these off the counter when you weren't
watching me? The tin foil was not so good the last time I put it in my
mouth, in fact it was really yucky. So Dad, could you give it to me?"

Then there is the unmistakable "Unghh!" as she pushes her food, with playful determination, off her high chair onto the floor. It's obvious that this utterance of "Unghh" is very different from the previous "Unghh." Yes, this this utterance should always be translated,

"Umm, Mom, Dad, thanks for dinner. I am full now. I know I only ate
5 kernels of corn, 3 carefully cut pieces of meat and 7 tiny cubes of
pineapple but I am full now and I really need to get down. I need to play.
The animals need this food more than me. Here you go animals. I really
need to get down and play. And could you please take these straps off
of me cause that are really kinda getting in my way. Let me-UNGH-just
get my foot-UNGH-up here like that-UNGH-and then I-ungh-will be free."